WHEN FRIENDSHIP HURTS
How to Deal with Friends Who Betray, Abandon, or Wound You
By Jan Yager, Ph.D.
Simon & Schuster - July 2002
ISBN: 0743211456 - Paperback
Nonfiction - Self-Help

Reviewed by Nancy Mehl for MyShelf.com
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It's happened to all of us. A close friend betrays you. Someone you trusted does something that wounds you deeply. This kind of pain can last a long time - and with it come questions that seem to have no answers. How did this happen? What were they thinking? And how in the world could they have done this to you? The only person who can answer these questions is gone from your life and you're left with the emotional fallout.

Dr. Jan Yager has the answers you've been looking for. And, just as importantly, her book, WHEN FRIENDSHIP HURTS, will help to keep you out of bad friendship traps in the future. This helpful book puts a magnifying glass to several different scenarios that lead to hurtful situations between "friends." You will probably be able to identify yourself in one of the examples. Also, you will be able to look closely at the different kinds of "friends" we sometimes allow into our lives. Examples include: The Promise Breaker, The Taker, The Double-Crosser, The Self-Absorbed, The Competitor, The One-Upper, The Rival, The Downer, The Blood-Sucker, The Copycat, and one I recognized…The Controller.

This valuable book will show you how to identify a destructive friendship, how to end it, and how to cope with the fallout of a failed relationship. Dr. Yager also points out how to handle the trauma when a friend walks away without explanation. This kind of rejection can be difficult when you have no idea why things went wrong. WHEN FRIENDSHIP HURTS, will give you the tools you need to search for answers to the friendship dilemma inside yourself - instead of looking for self worth through the actions of others - even those people we call "friends."

I recommend this well written, easy to understand guide to friendships. WHEN FRIENDSHIP HURTS is a book everyone who has a friend, has lost a friend, or ever plans to have a friend - needs to read.

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Nancy Mehl is the author of "Graven Images" and "Sinner's Song."

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