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How To Speak Your Spouseís Language:
Ten Easy Steps to Great Communication from One of the Americaís Foremost Counselors

by H. Norman Wright

      First comes love, then comes miscommunication. Do you ever feel that you and your spouse arenít compatible? Do you ever complain that your spouse doesnít understand you? Youíre not alone. Many couples report miscommunication as their biggest problem. Maybe you can remember a time when your spouse and you were on the same page - you communicated your love effectively. Was that a long time ago? Marriage expert and award-winning author H. Norman Wright shows you how to regain your closeness. In How to Speak your Spouseís Language, you can learn to turn communication into joyful interaction.

Do you know the crucial four minutes for communication? A positive or negative relationship is built in two specific time frames: the four minutes at the start of your day and the four minutes when you reunite at the end of the day. Wright says you can transform your relationship with positive, daily actions in those eight minutes. You might fill the morning with grumpy silence, commandeering breakfast, or effectively scheduling the day. Are you a silent partner, a commander, or an efficiency expert?

Now, look at what happens at the end of your day. Are those four minutes filled with news, the kidsí misbehavior, or minimal talking? Wright suggests respecting one anotherís space, even taking some time to transition from work to home. After the transition, you can approach each other with love and closeness.

What would you like to share with your spouse? Do you have an important subject to discuss? Agree on a daily time which you discuss serious matters. When you are both relaxed and prepared, you can decide on important topics.

Have you noticed your spouseís key words? By listening to types of words, you will find how your spouse receives information. As an example, a visual person will use the words look, see, and show. One secret to great communication is to use the other personís key words when talking.

Wright teaches you how to understand verbal and nonverbal communication, to speak your partnerís language, to learn good listening habits, to build common ground and to understand feelings - among other key lessons. These lessons can improve any relationship in which you want better communication. Readers will be amazed at the ease of the book, its clear examples, quick lessons, and chapter-end questions or "energy builders". Wright introduces solid concepts with a fresh focus.

Do you want love, marriage, and communication? Learn How to Speak Your Spouseís Language!

The Book

Hachette Book Group USA
November 2006
Non-fiction Self Help
More at

The Reviewer

Jennifer Akers
Reviewed 2007
© 2006